I was stupid

 

I was stupid. I have been trying to be as genuine as possible in everything and with everyone and this is the ultimate stupidity. This is not how humans deal with their surroundings and I’m a human being, a stupid human being. So? Have you learned your lesson? Is it time to start over, a fresh start with a new and normal mindset.

What you called masks, turned to be normal daily make up that people put, even men put sunscreen, balm and oil to their skin. You were the only one walking naked with your honesty and sins. Believe me honesty is tiring and repelling. People can’t stand honesty, it baffles them, make them question their own integrity and you know what we are all sinners, aren’t we? I deserve a break, a break from your love, from my memories, from our songs and artistic movies, a break from my dreams. Let me enjoy the mundane details of life just like everyone, laugh with others about mediocre things, get excited about silly stuff and get angry about everything around me in a calculated manner like everyone else. Let me be a copy of others, those ordinary people who accept the unfair rules of life, who surrendered to its absurdity and live their days without real happiness or real sadness. Apparently they are wiser than me, apparently this is how human beings live. It’s strange that I’m saying this now, as this morning I was thinking that I loved you just to empathize with everyone instead of being isolated in my own cocoon. You left me to feed me an unbearable pain on daily basis, this pain will show me how everyone else around me is suffering. I’m trying to justify my defeat, my wound or even trying not to blame you. Ok, no time to talk about you or your love, I have to get ready for my new personality. The one who doesn’t share his emotions with anyone, the one who knows how to hide his feelings and most importantly the one who perfectly acts as a happy cheerful optimistic person. Let us enjoy the new man and wish the old one eternal happiness and peace in another world.