The journey

 The return 

Yes, there must be a return. Every journey has an end and mine is not an exception. Farewelling people and revisiting place consume an enormous amount of time and energy. Finalizing all pending tasks and running around for last minute shopping is a great distraction, but I need to pause for a moment and think of what had happened. It was an opportunity, a rare one for me to grow, to detach myself, to keep a distance or enjoy being far and most importantly to reflect on the mess that I call “ my life”. Did I do anything of the above? No, no, and the credit goes to “procrastination”, my old friend, who insisted on accompanying more throughout the journey. He wasn’t alone, I was accompanied by so many friends: excuses, fake priorities, extended breaks and my eternal addiction to bad habits. 

Self lashing, another old friend popped up several times, but he was shushed by my numerous companions. A lost opportunity? it could be precived as such, or another scar that one day I’ll lament having. Maybe lessons are not learned from journeys like that one, maybe lessons don’t need seclusion, nor distance not a brand new routine, apparently they need consciousness and someone who became fed up of his legendary failure. 

So, it’s relevant to call every day a journey of its own, every moment a journey. One between right and wrong, between doing what should be done rather than lingering on what I love to do. A journey of self discipline or rather a journey of self discovery. Will it work? Will I survive such endless cycles of criticism and reform? Are all these thoughts part of my mid life crisis, or just  a rare moment of enlightenment or truth?