How painful that we will never sit with friends and answer this question. In fact I’m asking myself everyday, why did we meet? I became a wreck, useless corpse of someone who once had a life. I can’t return back to my previous life, frankly I don’t want to meet that zombie I used to be. But now, what am I now?
It rained today…. Rained so little but it was a nice change. I wanted to send you a message asking if it rained where you were, but I didn’t. I really wanted to send you one of my loud and crazy voice notes asking “ where are you?” But I didn’t. One message would have led to another and after a couple of hours we would have laughed, gossiped and teased each other.
“ go to one of your shrinks” that was what one of my friends told me. I should have told him that everyone in my life now is perceiving himself as a shrink. “ you look miserable” … “ you sound sad”…. “ you are not in the mood”…. Apparently you all want me to return back to the old version. But it’s too late, no one had ever survived love, one sided love, unfulfilled love.
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