Men

 It seems that I’m exposing men’s vulnerability with my letters to you. Yes, I treat them as letters, letters that I will never send you but I hope that one day we will read them together. Ironically I find reflections of my pain in the lives and reactions of all my friends and colleagues. We are all lonely within the crowds we deal with, we are weaker than we pretend and kinder than we seem. We all need love, but most of us refuse to admit. Why am I telling you this now? I never cared about such macho stereotypes, I never hid any of my feelings from you, no matter how childish they seemed, I was very keen to be myself. May be such transparency shocked you or annoyed you. May be I acted weirdly, I unfiltered my words and you know how talkative I can be, I nagged a lot, but as I told you I was thrilled and wanted to shout that “I am so happy”. My echoes were too disturbing, right?

Sorry, I just wanted to share with you this minor thought. It crossed my mind as I was looking at a group of men, well dressed, elegantly shaven and seem successful, but every poor soul of them was lost in his own thoughts, may be struggling in a personal battle. I know not all battles are romantic ones, I know, but even though, who gives any man the excuse to be needy, weak or confused. The endless list of accusations is always ready, so we, men, choose silence and put on one mask after the other till our real selves are suffocated beneath the weight of masculine lies. I met my real self with you, and even now, as I linger aimlessly alone, I hope I will never have to hide behind any mask.